What's the best way to get a date with Natalie Portman?

:lol: And here I thought your OT topics had come to an end.

But the #1 way to get a date with Natalie Portman is:

To not be an obsessed stalker!
 
[quote name='GameDude']What's the best way to get a date with Natalie Portman? I'm just curious. That's my goal for the time being.[/quote]

Try to find a girl with low self-esteem that you can dressup in Queen Amedala clothes. Thats as close as you're going to come.
 
GameDude: If you get one, wear a CAG shirt. That turns ALL the ladies on.

Plus free publicity!
 
[quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.
 
[quote name='dcfox'][quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.[/quote]

She's just a person. And she seems to be a pretty good girl. I'm stretching here...but if you never dream, life just kinda sucks, ya know.
 
[quote name='dcfox'][quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.[/quote]

Hey watch it. You're talking about my online gf. Natalie sent me pics and everything - I can send them to you if you need proof.
 
[quote name='GameDude'][quote name='dcfox'][quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.[/quote]

She's just a person. And she seems to be a pretty good girl. I'm stretching here...but if you never dream, life just kinda sucks, ya know.[/quote]

That said, if all you do is dream, your life still sucks.
 
[quote name='kaji7p56']Find out were she walks her dog, works out, eats lunch, etc., and take a bottle of Chloroform with you.[/quote]

Not only will you get to go on a date with her, you'll probably have a date for every night of the rest of your life with a big angry man named Bubba who you'll be sharing a cell with.
Don't drop the soap. :twisted:
 
[quote name='Ikohn4ever']you might have to be Jewish, depending on how religous she is[/quote]

That is an excellent point, perhaps he'll need a bit of a snip-snip :twisted:
 
[quote name='zionoverfire'][quote name='Ikohn4ever']you might have to be Jewish, depending on how religous she is[/quote]

That is an excellent point, perhaps he'll need a bit of a snip-snip :twisted:[/quote]

OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!!
 
My boss's daughter is an actress/waitress in New York City, she claims to have talked to Natalie on several ocassions because she walks her pooch in front of the coffeeshop she works at. At another job she says she also sold panties to Chris Kataan. LOL.
 
[quote name='SolidSnakeX99']My boss's daughter is an actress/waitress in New York City, she claims to have talked to Natalie on several ocassions because she walks her pooch in front of the coffeeshop she works at. At another job she says she also sold panties to Chris Kataan. LOL.[/quote]

NO! You can't have the Mango! :rofl:
 
[quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

You're right... it could happen... and monkeys might fly out of my ass!
 
The only way normal people date people like her is if they go to school with them (maybe you take the same class at a college where she is just like everyone else), or if you know them through a friend. If you fit one of those two categories it is entirely possible (unless she's stuckup and only dates famous people), but I highly doubt you do.
 
[quote name='JSweeney'][quote name='GameDude'][quote name='dcfox'][quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.[/quote]

She's just a person. And she seems to be a pretty good girl. I'm stretching here...but if you never dream, life just kinda sucks, ya know.[/quote]

That said, if all you do is dream, your life still sucks.[/quote]

Yeah, I'm well aware of that...that's why I'm asking you guys for opinions on how to do it. :cool:
 
[quote name='GameDude'][quote name='JSweeney'][quote name='GameDude'][quote name='dcfox'][quote name='GameDude']It's not out of the realm of possiblity. Granted, it's highly unlikely...but she's hot.[/quote]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have absolutely no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman. Its not a knock on you or anything because I have no chance in hell of dating Natalie Portman either. Neither does anyone else here.[/quote]

She's just a person. And she seems to be a pretty good girl. I'm stretching here...but if you never dream, life just kinda sucks, ya know.[/quote]

That said, if all you do is dream, your life still sucks.[/quote]

Yeah, I'm well aware of that...that's why I'm asking you guys for opinions on how to do it. :cool:[/quote]

Sell your soul to the devil? Although not even he cannot work miracles.
 
All I did was ask her out for coffee and it worked. She was cool and all, but after a few dates I got tired of the whole scene.
 
Date Natalie in 3 simple steps:

1. Become a famous actor in well0-respected art-house movies and the occasional blockbuster.

2. Get a co-starring role with her in some Rob Reiner love movie.

3. If you have on-screen chemistry with her, ask her to go with you to your villa in Tuscany for the weekend.

Wow, once you type it out, it sounds really simple :lol:
 
Oh no, I'm too late! :cry:
london2.JPG
 
[quote name='road3283']Actually, that dude is carrying a purse-- probably doesn't go for the ladies. I think you might still have a chance.[/quote]

:rofl: I almost fell out of my chair after reading that one.
 
[quote name='Kaijufan']Just kidnap her.[/quote]

If there is one thing to be learned from American Dad (though most likely there is not one thing to be learned from American Dad), it is that this is the most likely solution to succeed.
 
[quote name='JSweeney'][quote name='zionoverfire'][quote name='Ikohn4ever']you might have to be Jewish, depending on how religous she is[/quote]

That is an excellent point, perhaps he'll need a bit of a snip-snip :twisted:[/quote]

OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!![/quote]

I nearly fell out of my chair reading this. JSweeney, your responses are just priceless.
 
a buddy of mine, who is a super cool dude, went out to get coffee with her when he was at Harvard, kind of like a date but that was it (she went to Harvard also). Apparently she is really nice.
 
[quote name='Dr Mario Kart'][quote name='Kaijufan']Just kidnap her.[/quote]

If there is one thing to be learned from American Dad (though most likely there is not one thing to be learned from American Dad), it is that this is the most likely solution to succeed.[/quote]

Of course, haven't you ever heard of the "Stockholm Syndrome"?
 
[quote name='JSweeney'][quote name='kaji7p56']Find out were she walks her dog, works out, eats lunch, etc., and take a bottle of Chloroform with you.[/quote]

Not only will you get to go on a date with her, you'll probably have a date for every night of the rest of your life with a big angry man named Bubba who you'll be sharing a cell with.
Don't drop the soap. :twisted:[/quote]

That actually sounds pretty good right about now :twisted: .
 
[quote name='JSweeney'][quote name='Dr Mario Kart'][quote name='Kaijufan']Just kidnap her.[/quote]

If there is one thing to be learned from American Dad (though most likely there is not one thing to be learned from American Dad), it is that this is the most likely solution to succeed.[/quote]

Of course, haven't you ever heard of the "Stockholm Syndrome"?[/quote]

That's how I met my first wife :twisted:
 
The only likely approach I can imagine involves a time machine and a detailed plan for amending the circumstances of your birth and upbringing. Don't forget the anti-HGH. Nat's on the short side, so she is unlikely to date one of the guys in the Wookie costumes.
 
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